Imperfect Me

Today I had an incident/confrontation that upset me. In hind sight it was minor and unimportant so I won’t bore you with the details. Never the less, I was upset.  So of course I acted in a way that made me ashamed. I didn’t do anything bad. Most people probably wouldn’t have thought twice about my actions, but I did. See my goal is to try to be more Christ-like every day, and my reaction was not a representation of God’s love flowing through me at all. So my being upset went from external (mad at some one else) to internal (mad at myself). When I get upset with myself I reflect. 

I remember reading an article about God using our shortcomings to bless others, but first we have to admit what our shortcomings are. (I wish I could remember the author and the scripture reference, but I am drawing a blank.) So I took a look at myself and came up with some of my shortcomings.

                I can be: insecure

                                Control freak

                                Perfectionist

                                Jealous

                                Overly sensitive

                                Grudge holder

 These are not by any means all of them. These are just the ones that came up with this particular situation.

 In 2 Corinthians 12: 9 and 10 Paul says, “Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (NIV)” Paul begged for God to take away his afflictions, but God didn’t. God did promise Paul that His power would be visible in Paul’s life and ministry.

If we didn’t have imperfections we would have no need for God. I know the first thing I did when I became upset with myself was pray. I should have done that before I reacted. My prayer is that I can get out of God’s way and allow him to use my hang ups for someone else’s benefit.  

Until the Whole World Hears,

Cary

PS: Everything is ok now. I tend to over react a lot of times. :) It is the drama queen living in me.